Adventures With The Unknown

"Real students," said Robert Henri, " go out of beaten paths, whether beaten by themselves or by others, and have adventures with the unknown."

Over the past few weeks I have been adventuring into this unknown.  I joke that there are paintings from Before and from After.   I can tell the difference and it is not some pleasant preening over the fact that I learned something but more like the stomach clenching drop from the top of a roller coaster.  I am gripping tightly as everything tilts.  This is dangerous country, where something clicks in your perception and painting is no longer what it was but something else, and do you have the courage to push forward into the unknown or are you going to cling to what you thought you once knew like a little girl?

I don't know. I've lost just about all of my innocence now, about painting and art careers and what that might mean. The idea of a career as I once understood it simply does not fit with the reality of the artistic culture. This is not a nine to five proposition with a steady income and yearly promotions. It is far more intimate, visceral.  I heard one of the judges on American Idol tell a disappointed contestant that "we've all heard no more than we've heard yes."   There has to be something else motivating each creative impulse than what our initial naivety once suggested.

I have looked at a lot of my own paintings since the "After" and realized that what puts the magic there - or not - is something that can't be distilled down to a style, a color combination, a popular motif.   I see paintings by artists working in my chosen genres and styles, and the degree of talent is breath taking.  For me to focus on competing with that is mind boggling, a risky waste of time and energy.  Chasing after subject matter or technique to master a popular style perhaps has value for some artists.  But perhaps it is just as important to chase after something through the force of your own need, a desire to discover what it is that reaches into your soul and hangs on tight. 

Especially in art.  

Across the Valley

22 x 28, oil on canvas

@2010

Comments

[Donald Diddams]

So many siren songs out there to lure us onto the rocks, and so many distractions to draw us away from our internal muse. Staying true is easier said than done.

[margie]

You are such an inspiration to us all! Yesterday I received a Google Alert from your blog, and after reading it I posted a new blog entry based on your Life Lessons Learned Through the Pursuit of Art. Thank you for sharing and motivating me to get off my duff and do something!

[Jo-Ann Sanborn]

Yes, the magic's in there. Congrats

[Maggie]

Beautiful painting. And you're right; to focus on competing wastes our artistic energy. My husband says there will always be someone better than you, so get over it and get to work. It's the working that counts.
Thanks

[Laurierohner]

Yes I am in total agreement and your words hit home. Your painting Across the Valley is expressive and emotional and not just a painting. Bravo.

[Pat Burns]

Wow...we must be on the same timeline! So glad that you have the verbal skills to capture it and share with us all.