Sunday Salon: When you feel the pain

"I'm stuck, in a rut."
"I'm frustrated and discouraged"
"I'm stressed out; everything's urgent."
"Maybe I just don't have what it takes."

These are a few of the opening sentences in Stephen R. Covey's new book, The 8th Habit, From Effectiveness to Greatness.

If you follow this blog, you know that I read a lot of books, and about 75% of them are not about art. But "Art" doesn't live in a vacuum, apart from the rest of our lives.  What  works and doesn't work in our "real" world is the same sort of stuff that works or doesn't work in our "Art" world.

If we were in our early 20's, our "Art" lives would be different.  We'd have the time and freedom to explore ideas, themes, techniques, and problems with the enthusiasm of one who sees no end in sight.  As we age, though, it's natural that "the end" begins creeping toward our horizon.  I received an email recently from Casey Klahn who explained,

"One thing I've discovered as an older artist is that it is important for me to start "at the top". I am not a school kid, after all!"

I remember feeling times of great urgency, a limited window of opportunity that I was going to miss - and still do.  I remember pushing myself nearly to the point of exhaustion and then feeling frustrated with the results - and still do.  So how do we achieve a sense of balance between the urgency of the Muse and the realization there might not be enough time left to do all we dream about doing?
 

Here are some ideas to get you thinking:

• Believe that there is enough time to do what you are supposed to do.  Once I freed myself from the belief that time was working against me, my life became easier.  I would walk into my studio and not feel the self-imposed pressure to create something that would "sell now!"  In fact, I realized the more I tried to answer that demand of "sell now!" (which was a form of needing to justify what I was doing) the worse my work became - and the more frustrated I felt.

• Realize that the "top" is only a marker on the spiral, just a "starting point" for the next growth cycle.  I understand where Casey is coming from when he says he needs to start "at the top."  Because we are entering the art market at a mature age, the art market expects a high level of competency.  Our work can't be excused as young and brash, full of passion, short on technique, but loads of potential.  So it's necessary to study artists working at the levels of competency to which we aspire in order to ensure that our work is comparable before we approach the market.

• Growth requires us to "hate" our work periodically.  I once had an exercise t-shirt that read : "No Pain, No Gain."  I wasn't into pain, so I never saw much gain. Its the same with art.   Being stuck, feeling anxious, frustrated, angry, experiencing the emotional pain of hating what I'm producing - I used to dread it.  I still dread that moment of walking into the studio and looking at the painting I just finished and immediately "hating" it. But I've come to realize these are messages from my unconscious, my artistic soul, telling me, "hey, you gotta move on here!  Your work was fine for where you were last year, but this is Now." 
  

• Become your own best mentor.  Be kind to yourself.  When you grow to the point of recognizing there is something missing in your work - rejoice.  It means you've developed your "eye" to the point where you're able to progress, and that you're not suffering from what Robert Genn calls "Kalopsia"  (an interesting read in the click-backs).  And as your own best mentor, take on the responsibility of learning what else you might need to know at this point on the spiral - whether you watch instructional DVD's, read books, draw daily, paint daily -- whatever you do, begin to expand your practice consistently.
  

• It's also okay to work within your comfort zone.  Out of curiosity, I started reading art blogs coming out of the New York Art Scene.  I quickly discovered that I didn't belong in that rarefied world of artspeak, critical laceration, bizarre theory, shock art, power plays, movers and shakers, blog wars, hoaxes and non-hoaxes pretending to be hoaxes...okay, too much hyperbole here.  My point is only that it's better to focus energy where you know you want it and not spend it where it drains away your enthusiasm.  Activism, while fondly remembered, might be better left to the young.

So what is Covey's 8th Habit?

The 8th Habit "is to Find Your Voice and Inspire Others to Find Theirs" (p. 5).

Interesting, huh?

Comments

[Marsha Robinett]

This is a great article and some wonderful comments thus far also...all, I might add came at just the right time.

[sue]

It has taken me a long time to get the siblings (ego/career and independence/creativity) to stop fighting with each other. For a long time I bought into the idea that there was a goal out there I could achieve if I just worked harder, painted better...This was a terrible pressure to live with, and if my experiences empower others in their journey, then maybe I'm achieving part of Covey's 8th Habit?

[June]

Sue,

I find a kind of comfort in knowing that I simply have to focus on what I want and need in my art, rather than what I think I _should_ want or what others think artists should be doing or should want.

This doesn't have anything to do with the seriousness with which I approach my work nor with my ambition to do the best work I can; it simply means that I can focus on the work itself without having to deal with all the other baggage of careerism, otherism, tiresome egoism (which differs from just plain egoism), and the pains of being 20 or 40 or even 60. I am more content to know that I can't take the time to explore those tangential distracting matters that used to be a kind of procrastinating device.

Well, I could go on and on. I don't like the aging process in many ways, but in terms of feeling freer about pursuing the art I want to pursue, in my own inimitable ways, I feel like a beam of light, directed where it should be, illuminating what needs to be seen.

Enough of the metaphors. The ruminations on aging artists and the artistry of the same is fun.

[sue]

I have been reading Creative Authenticity by Ian Roberts, a wonderful book as he speaks to this and so many other issues.
It is a "must have" for any artist's shelf. I've read it once and I'm working my way through it a second time - it's that good!

[Bonnie Luria]

Another advantage of being older ( than what, I'm not able to say...) is the recognition we've earned and ought to feel entitled to.

More than ever, the resources are available to continue honing our interests and skills.

It's easy to fall into the quagmire of comparisons to those more prolific, more successful, and feel less than.

What I've noticed happening as I've gotten older is my reluctance to just jump into the fray, whether it's a painting, a job, an opinion.

I'm in the mode of learning, watching, and as you've indicated here, trying to be kind to myself.